Topic - 90-10 Principle

Description
• It is the ability to handle any situation without getting ruffled.
• This can be used in almost every situation in life, anywhere, everywhere and with anyone.
• It helps us to change a problematic situation into manageable situation.

Intent
• Discover the 90/10 Principle as It will change our life.
• Apply this principle and avoid undeserved stress, trials, problems, and heartache.
• We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us. The other 90% is different. We determine the other 90%!

Example situation for the facilitator
You’re eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what just happened. What happens next will be determined by how you react. You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the coffee cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize them for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed zone.
After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 (traffic fine) away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs to the building without saying good-bye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to going home. When you arrive home, you find a small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter. Why? Because the way you reacted in the morning.
Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the Policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?
The answer is D. You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day.
Here is what could have and should have happened. Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say, “It’s OK honey, you just need to be more careful next time.” Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You and your spouse kiss before you both

Questions
In a situation, when provoked what do you do?
What makes you to react in a situation?
Have you ever felt that a day was particularly a very bad day?
Can you share experiences where you had responded instead of reacting?

Situations for students
1. Your mother asks you to go to the market. But you want to study. So you refuse to go. Your mother scolds you very badly. You get extremely angry. But still you ignore your anger and go to the market.
2. Your family is going on a tour. The van breaks down on the way. Every
One is disappointed. The van cleaner walks down to the nearby town and
brings a mechanic. The van gets repaired and you continue the journey.
3. Three people decide to take an auto to central station. One of them calls for an auto, but does not bargain the amount. All the three of them reach central. The auto driver charges 20 rupees more. The person who paid feels cheated and gets extremely angry and shouts at the driver.
4. A person travels to a new place. While returning the person is alone. And the train ticket is not yet confirmed.

Students Response
1. Action: Not studying the lessons as told by the teacher
Reaction: teacher’s anger
Response: understanding that and reading the lessons the next time.

2. Action: mother doesn’t cook food
Reaction: daughter gets angry
Response: father pacifies
3. Action: not taking pen to the exam
Reaction: she forgets all answers
Response: teacher gives her a pen. She wrote the exam well.
Activity: Role plays
Scene 1
Morning 6’ o clock, newspaper arrives. The brother and sister of the house fight with each other as to who will read the paper first. Both of them pull the paper and it gets torn. Father shouts at them.
Scene 2
Both of them fight for the newspaper. The brother suggests that they can share and read.